If you can't be a good example, be a warning!

A while back we were at Crossfit talking about goals and I mentioned that I didn't really have any goals other than what I was already doing. And It was true! My goals have always been to just be a strong, fit and healthy person so I can be a good mom, wife etc. I summed this up with my semi-notorious quote "I don't want to pimp my ride!" Meaning I want to change the oil and keep the engine running well so my car can get me from point A to point B for a long-time to come but I don't want to trick it out with rims and spoilers and cool details. I didn't have aspirations for competitive glory or a certain number in mind for any benchmark workout or lift. And then the Crossfit Open games came. And I got aaaallll caught up in the excitement.
    Maybe I had no business even doing the open games at all with my goals and my current level of training. I wasn't the person coming to the gym for multiple sessions a week trying to improve my dead-lift or get my first muscle up. It was never a goal of mine to compete in the open games or achieve anything in them so I didn't do anything to prepare for them other than my usual 3 times a week CF routine. Many people from our box were signing up and I thought "What the heck? It'll be a fun challenge". I was also kind of enamored by the idea of a world-wide competition that starts in every small town and then narrows down the competitors as time goes on. Such a global-village kind of idea. Very cool. So the games started.
14.1 happened with double unders and I bought a jump rope and practiced all weekend. Did my work-out and thought "Hey! I can do this!" It was cool to see my name on the leaderboard.
14.2 came and I got 2 chest to bar that I didn't know I could do. I thought "I'll have to work on those."
14.3 happened and I was away and had to use this ghetto set of weights and thus scored lower than I was capable of doing. I thought "Arrrrgh! I'm dropping in the ranks! I need to go big in these last 2 workouts and recover from this lame score!"
14.4 came with 50 toes to bar and I finished them but only had about 15 seconds to go on to the next round which I KNEW I could have crushed if only that had come first "Just wait till next year, I thought... I'm gonna be able to crank out those Toes to Bar!"
Then 14.5 was announced... thrusters and burpees?!? FINALLY! 2 things I can actually do!! I was determined to go as hard and as big as I possibly could. There would be no regrets this time about not being able to get to something I could do well at or struggling with lame weights. I had a stomach bug the week before but that had finally resolved the day before I was supposed to do the workout so I was all ready to go. So on Monday I did it. And I gave 120%. I was stoked with my time and knew I had gone as hard as I could possibly have gone. I actually had a hard time driving the car home my arms were so cooked. The next day they were horribly sore. Sore to move, sore to the touch, and kind of swollen. All week long I couldn't function. Like could not put my hair in a pony tail or un-do my own bra. (Does this sound compatible with my goal of being a healthy, functioning individual?) Tried to go back to CF on Wed but it was kind of pointless - there was really nothing I could do and I just took Friday off. By Monday I was 80% recovered and I decided to go back to CF and just take it easy. 4 rounds into the WOD I realized I needed to just walk away. Thank goodness I stopped when I did. By that afternoon my arms were swelling up like sausages and they felt weirdly numb. I went to the Dr. and after a blood test the diagnosis came back. A mild case of Exertional Rhabdomyolysis. My CK levels 9 days after the workout were at 3,680 (30-60) is normal. Acute cases of this can lead to renal failure and even death. Dehydration puts you at a much higher risk for this which certainly contributed to my case.
           Last year Sasha came home from a trip to the States all fired up about Gymnastics. Her cousin  is really into it and very passionate about what she's doing and so Sash got all fired up too. She watched a whole bunch of gymnastics movies and wanted to sign up right away. Now this kid's not a gymnast. She's musical, dramatic, and artsy and I knew this wasn't her thing but sometimes you have to let them try right? Who knows.... So we signed up. She quit about 2 months later and sighed to me "Gymnastics is just not MY thing." I told her that I understood. And I told her that when you are around someone who is really passionate about their goals that it's easy to get caught up in that excitement and take up those same goals and dreams even if they're not YOUR goals and dreams. Ahhh... such a wise Mom right?
    Wait a minute. Didn't I just do the EXACT same thing? Didn't I get caught up in the excitement of someone else's goals and dreams and then plunge right into them? Except... I hadn't trained enough to be ready for that.
   So now I'm benched. My Dr. tells me that I am not allowed to so much as walk my dog until my arms go back to normal and my CK levels come down. I was supposed to run the Glow Run with my kids on Fri and I am now in the cheering section. Does THAT sound compatible with my goal of being a strong, healthy Mom?
    None of this would have happened if I could have channeled a little bit of moderation and stayed true to my own rants about "If you're eating healthy and keeping your body fit and strong you've already won!" So that is my cautionary tale. Don't get me wrong... Having the goal of being a professional or competitive athlete is a worthy one. And if that is your goal, right on! Train hard, be careful out there and try to never let your reach exceed your grasp. If I know you, I will be at the front of your fan-group cheering you on. But having the goal of being a strong, healthy, and functioning individual is also a worthy one. And that is the track that I want to get back on. I AM going to get back to the gym when I'm allowed. I want to live a healthy life, stay fit, be strong, and always have enough energy to keep up with my kiddos. End of goals. And that's OK. If I'm ever in a place where I'm even THINKING about signing up for anything that results in my name being on a leaderboard please stage an intervention. Just being healthy is enough. If you're there, you've already won.
    Jeff always tells me that I can never find the safety barrier without crashing right through it and then in hind-sight turning around and being all "That was it!" So there you go. I found it. Since I can't be a good example, I can at least be a warning.